Monday, July 08, 2013

Question of the Week: Newborn Advice

If you could instill one piece of advice in a newborn baby's mind, what advice would you give?

I'm thinking of this question all wrong. I want to be able to give a newborn amazing abilities. You know, things like, born potty trained or the ability to tell parents what they want rather than crying to denote every single discomfort. I'm sure there are amazing parents out there who are able to determine exactly what their infant child requires with each nuanced wail. When I hear it, crying just seems like crying. Could be anything, really. But I'm getting way off track. It'd be nice to look back at my own infancy and think about what I'd have liked to have known then that I know now. I can't really think of anything useful in my adult or even childhood years that makes me think, "Gee, I really could have used that bit of information when I was 6 months old!" Advice, when it comes down to it, is really just knowledge, right? And knowledge isn't all that helpful if one can't communicate it or act upon it. Babies can't do those things. They lack the ability to speak until they learn it and develop that skill over time. They lack the ability to mobilize themselves until their bodies grow and develop, again, over time. Parents, I'm sure you'll have a much better answer to this question than I can come up with. I look forward to your responses.

Seriously though, that's the part where you answer the question. I always post these questions every week but rarely get answers from readers in the comments. That's what the comment section is there for! I want you to use it! So, really, what advice would you want to instill in your newborn's mind? I figure, by the time I have kids, we'll be learning things Matrix-style, so I'll actually be able to instill advice, literally, into my newborn child's mind. So you're helping me out by answering.

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