Very Vanilla

Like most people, I occasionally have a hankering for the classic novelty dessert, the ice cream sandwich. Sadly, I'm not a big fan of chocolate. But I've forced myself through it so I can enjoy that ice creamy sandwichy deliciousness. Ladies and gentlemen of the internet, I have discovered an amazing product that has broken the chains of slavery to chocolate as part of the ice cream sandwich. I give you...

That's right! Ice cream sandwiches with vanilla ice cream sandwiched between vanilla cookie like whatever that's officially called. They are so very good.

Whoever came up with the idea for these things must be a certified genius. And this cannot possibly be a new development, right? Someone please tell me that humanity was intelligent enough to come up with this idea decades ago, I've just managed to miss it because I rarely took a turn down the ice cream aisle at the store.

You know what time it is? Pretty sure it's time for a very vanilla ice cream sandwich.

All This and Andy Rooney

                                                     Source: news.yahoo.com via Betty on Pinterest

As a kid I never really liked watching news shows. To this day, I'm not much of a news watcher. Mostly I don't like the bad news. And it seems like that's most of what the news is. But for the last few years, I've become interested in some of the shows that come on CBS on Sunday evenings. Mostly, these consist of The Amazing Race and Big Brother. So, much of the time, I'll catch the end of 60 Minutes. Usually, I'll catch enough of the news magazine to see whatever Andy Rooney has to say that week.

And last night was the end of that particular era. Andy Rooney delivered his final last word for 60 Minutes. They showed a lot of clips of the things he's discussed over the years. And the more I've watched of his commentaries, the more I've realized, I could totally do that.

Think about it, most of what he does is give his opinion about random stuff. Occasionally he'll delve into a serious topic, but most of the time it seems like random thoughts about random occurrences. It's as if he's been writing a blog similar to this, and then just reading them out loud on camera.

So, CBS, if you're looking for a replacement for Andy Rooney, I formally submit myself. Just take a look at some of the things I've written on this blog and imagine someone reading them out loud with a mostly sarcastic kind of tone. Yeah, I could do that.

Present

"Present!" yelled Kimberly, just loud enough for her elderly home room teacher to hear her. After hearing her name called, she decided to tune everything out until first period. She had a lot on her mind and really didn't want to deal with anything until she absolutely had to. If she could have, she probably would have tried to lock herself in a sensory deprivation tank for the next half hour. But she wasn't that lucky.

"Pssst!"

Kimberly ignored the attempt to get her attention. She knew that Sam wanted to talk to her, but she really didn't want to talk to him. It wasn't that she didn't like Sam, she just wanted to be left alone for a while.

"Kim!" Sam whispered, though it was the kind of whisper that everyone in the classroom could hear. She turned, giving Sam a look beyond irritation, making him jump back a little in his seat.

"What are you gonna do?" he asked, clearly not taking a hint.

"About what?" Kimberly asked, honestly unaware of what Sam meant.

"Are you gonna go out with Jack or not?"

"How is that any of your business?" she asked, becoming increasingly annoyed, especially considering that this conversation consisted of nothing but questions with no answers.

"Well, it's not," Sam said quietly, unsure how to proceed. "It's just that Jack's like a brother to me. I don't wanna see him get hurt."

Kimberly was a little confused. She couldn't understand why Sam would bring this up, or why Sam would think Jack would get hurt by going out with her.

"I don't get it," she said, "Are you afraid that I'll hurt him by saying yes or by saying no?"

"I don't know. Maybe I just--"

"Samuel Dewey!" said Mrs. Caldwell over the hushed conversation.

"Here!" said Sam. "I just think you should be careful about everything. He really likes you, you know?"

"Yeah, I know," she said, unable to help but smile. The truth was, she liked Jack too. But she couldn't just come out and say that. She had to play hard to get, right?

"See, that's just mean."

"What are you talking about?"

Sam huffed, "You smile when you say you know he likes you. It's like you're just playing with him."

"You don't know the first thing about me!" said Kimberly. At this point she was having a difficult time keeping her voice to a whisper. Sam was really starting to piss her off. "What happens between me and Jack is between me and Jack. If he wants to talk to you about it, that's on him. But you and me: not friends! You don't get to ask me personal questions about who I'm dating!"

With that, the conversation was over. She knew Sam well enough to know that he would go straight to Jack before first period to tell him not to go out with her. But she also knew Jack well enough to know that he would ignore Sam's advice. Yeah, they were friends, but once Jack set his mind to something, he did it. At that thought, she smiled a little again. Sam would misinterpret her current facial expression, but that was mostly because he was stupid and assumed whatever he wanted to assume.

Mrs. Fields had finally finished taking attendance. For the next 20 minutes, homeroom would be dull. Kimberly really did have a lot on her mind. It wasn't just whether or not she would accept Jack's invitation to dinner and a movie. She had a paper due in her World Lit class tomorrow. She had a pretty big test in Calculus that afternoon. She had to finish putting her portfolio together for Photojournalism by the end of the week.

On top of her schoolwork, she had soccer practice every afternoon. She loved playing the game. It's just that, with everything else going on, it seemed like one more thing to deal with.

After what felt like an eternity of boredom and annoyance, the bell rang to signal the end of homeroom. She made her way to the restroom so she could make sure her hair looked okay. A part of her didn't really care how her hair looked. But a bigger part of her knew that she'd eventually see Jack and she wanted to look decent, just in case Sam was able to plant the seed of doubt in his mind.

She made her way to first period History, but was really not paying attention to the world moving around her. Throughout her classes, and even during her Calculus test, she remained preoccupied. She may have been present in body, but definitely not in mind.

This week's topic inspired by Sunday Scribblings. See how others interpreted the prompt by clicking here!

AFI 74 - The Silence of the Lambs

The Silence of the Lambs

1991

Directed by Jonathan Demme

Netflix sleeve: In this pulse-pounding adaptation of Thomas Harris's novel, FBI trainee Clarice Starling (Jodie Foster) ventures into a maximum-security asylum to pick the diseased brain of Hannibal Lecter (Anthony Hopkins), a psychiatrist turned homicidal cannibal. Starling needs clues to help her capture a serial killer; unfortunately, her Faustian relationship with Lecter soon leads to his escape... and now, two deranged killers are on the loose.

Here's one that I had probably seen about a dozen times before I ever thought about doing this AFI thing. It really is a great movie. It's creepy, it's suspenseful, and it introduced the world to Anthony Hopkins as Hannibal Lecter. The guy gets less than 20 minutes of screen time, but how many people think of Buffalo Bill as the primary psychopath when they think of this movie? How many of you out there just asked, "Who's Buffalo Bill?" He's the one that demands that the girl puts the lotion on the skin. You probably don't want to see this late at night. That stuff will mess with your head.

Question of the Week: Complimentary

When you are given a compliment do you usually acknowledge it or suggest that you really do not deserve it?

Of course I deserve it. I'm awesome.

Okay, really, it all depends on who is paying the compliment. If it's a close friend or family member who truly knows my dry sense of humor, I play it off an pretend like I've got a huge ego and they're just fueling it. If it's a co-worker or superior or just someone that I don't know very well, I typically say thank you and move on. In reality, I don't let compliments go to my head. I do the best I can at whatever I'm trying to do and if it catches someone's attention, so be it. If not, at least I can get a good night's sleep knowing that I did the best I could.

And that's... one to grow on.

*Question of the Week comes from The Book of Questions by Gregory Stock, Ph.D.

The First Timer

For a long time I've been calling myself a fan of Virginia Tech. Don't worry, it's been going on longer than a lot of people might think. I'm not one of those guys that jumped on the Virginia Tech bandwagon back when Michael Vick was playing. I'm just not the kind of person that gets openly excited about football.

Don't get me wrong. I like football. I just don't follow it closely enough to have a decent fantasy team. I like to watch a game, but if Tech isn't playing, I generally don't care who wins. I don't pay attention to rankings. I don't pay attention to what a certain team's win-loss record is going to do to how Virginia Tech rises or falls from week to week.

Despite my apparent lack of enthusiasm towards sports in general, I do call myself a fan of the Hokies. But I had never been to a game at Lane Stadium. Never, that is, until last weekend.

A few weeks back I got a text message from Kelly, a friend from the Bluefield days. She let me know that she and a couple of her friends had a fourth ticket for Tech's game versus Arkansas State. Since I had never been to a live game, I jumped on it. I'll admit, I was pretty excited.

I hitched a ride from Roanoke to Blacksburg with Kelly's friends Lesley and Adam. They were the real connection to the tickets, so if they're reading this, thanks again for bringing me along for the ride. Not only did we have incredible seats (I'll get to those later), we had a parking pass for Lot 2. This put us approximately nine parking spaces away from the stadium.

You know what a great part of the fun of going to a football game is? If you said tailgating, you were right. We grilled burgers and dogs, played some Cornhole, and pretty much just had a swell time.

Eventually the time came for us to make our way inside. Our seats? Just to the right of the 50 yard line. We were about midway up the home side. Oh, and we had cushions and seat backs. That's right, we didn't have to sit on the cold, metal bleachers.

I guess I got kind of spoiled with my first game. I'm going to expect an awesome parking space and awesome comfortable seats the next time I go to a football game. And I'm sure that's not how it will happen. I'm sure I'll end up parking on the other side of town and I'll need to walk all the way to the game. I'm sure I'll be stuck on the bleachers surrounded by drunk guys who spill beer all over me and my friends.

My only true complaint about my first time home game experience is the old folks that were all around us. There was an old lady in front of me that kept leaning back on her seat back and shoving it into my knees. Every time she leaned back, she pretty much hyper-extended the seat back. It's okay though, I wasn't using those knees anyway. And let's not forget the elderly man sitting next to me. I'm pretty sure he thought I was his grandson. He kept explaining things to me. As I said above, I'm not the most sports-savvy guy, but I know what it means when someone is off sides.

Okay, sometimes I have a hard time understanding off sides.

And, of course, Tech won. It was a pretty good game. And I had an awesome time. I want to go again. I'm not saying I'm ready for my own season tickets, but I could handle another game.

AFI 75 - In the Heat of the Night

In the Heat of the Night

1967

Directed by Norman Jewison

Netflix sleeve: Philadelphia detective Virgil Tibbs (Sidney Poitier) helps a redneck Southern sheriff (Rod Steiger) solve a murder in this fascinating study in racism that still strikes a resonant chord today. Steiger won a Best Actor Oscar for his performance as the put-upon sheriff who comes to respect Tibbs's professionalism and ability. Norman Jewison directs this dramatic tale with a feeling for the cultural and social atmosphere of the time.

Growing up, my only exposure to In the Heat of the Night was the TV series starring Carroll O'Connor. And when that show was on, I was just a kid and I remember always being disappointed whenever it came on. Because it came on during the day once it hit syndication. So during the summer, when I was home to enjoy daytime TV, I was just met with disappointment when I saw that it was coming on. If I'd had any clue how awesome the original movie was, I'd have probably given the show a shot. 44 years later, the movie still has a relevant message. And even if the problem of racism didn't still exist, the movie would still be worth watching. For one thing, it shows an accurate portrayal of a small town in the deep south in the mid-1960s. For another, it's a great murder mystery with an exciting ending. If you've never given this movie a chance, give it a chance. Definitely worth it.

So... Yeah...

I've really been slacking on the blogging. I don't have any real excuses for my slacking.

No, that's a lie. I do have excuses. And they're decent excuses. They mostly revolve around the fact that I've been staying busy. I'm still getting used to the new job, even though I'm almost a month into it. It's great, but there's a definite learning curve here that I'm adjusting to.

What else? Well, the social life isn't lying dead in the gutter these days. I go out with friends. I visit my friends' homes. I go to Virginia Tech football games. I drive to the Richmond area for surprise birthday parties. I drive to my old home in North Carolina to participate in a Heart Walk with a company for whom I no longer work.

So yeah... I've been kind of busy. But I promise I'll get caught up. I just need to find a new groove. Maybe that new groove will mean the elimination of the daily post, as I've tried so hard to be faithful to in the past. But I definitely want to have a regular schedule. Stay tuned kids. Don't forget about me. Don't stop following me. I promise to do better.

Question of the Week: In God's Hands

A cave-in occurs while you and a stranger are in a concrete room deep in a mine shaft. Before the phone goes dead, you learn the entire mine is sealed and the air hole being drilled will not reach you for 30 hours. If you both take sleeping pills from the medicine chest, the oxygen will last for only 20 hours. Both of you can't survive; alone, one of you might. After you both realize this, the stranger takes several sleeping pills, says that it is in God's hands, and falls asleep. You have a pistol; what do you do?

Wow... that's a really long and involved question. Okay, where did I get this pistol? Why isn't this listed as one of my assets at the beginning, along with the sleeping pills? Why do I have the pistol? Why doesn't the stranger have it? This is just an unlikely situation. Obviously, I wait for the stranger to fall asleep, then I shoot him in the head. But then I make it look like he committed suicide because he panicked and couldn't take suffocating to death. I'm totally kidding, by the way. I'm not a complete psychopath. I wouldn't be able to kill a stranger who just took a handful of pills. Depending on how many he took, he may have just accidentally OD'ed. But I guess that would be the part that's in God's hands. On the other hand, I couldn't use the gun to kill myself either. So I'd take a sleeping pill too. Guess I'll be putting it in God's hands too.

*Question of the Week comes from The Book of Questions by Gregory Stock, Ph.D.

I Totally Could've Done That

Just when you think I can't possibly find anything else to say about the awesomeness that is Back to the Future, someone comes along and makes a YouTube video like this. By the way, I'm pretty sure I could do something like this. Except with the entire movie. 'Cause I've seen it that many times. Enjoy.