Anger

I feel that I can admit that I have some anger management issues. I've made it no secret on this blog that I have a tendency to bottle things up and then, in private, explode for no apparent reason.

Most of the time, when I get angry, that feeling is not directed at anyone or anything in particular. Most of the time, my anger is directed at nameless, faceless customers or random drivers on the road. I'm not saying it's right, but that's just how it normally happens.

Last night I got angry. And my anger was most decidedly directed at a particular person. My anger last night was also directed at an organization. I will not be throwing out any titles, nor will I name names, but those of you in my personal life may read this posting and draw your conclusions. I only ask that you maintain the anonymity of the object of this anger.

Over the last few weeks, events have continually occurred that have been extremely irritating. Okay, it's been more than irritating, but I've been doing my best to keep my nose out of it. But the things that have been happening and the things that have been said have been malicious and hurtful to people I care about.

Would you believe that the source of all these malicious and hurtful things is a leader in a church?

Look, I realize that the church is made up of people. I heard a wise man once say, "If you find the perfect church get out of it before you mess it up." The point there is that people are imperfect. People make mistakes. Therefore, a church is also prone to be led by people who make mistakes.

But church leaders should not be beyond reproach. When they make mistakes, shouldn't it be our responsibility as the church body to call them out? It's so easy for people in leadership positions to allow pride to seep in. When that happens, it's real easy to consider oneself better than the people they're leading.

What happens then, when these church leaders refuse to accept the fact that they messed up; that they are actually human? What happens when, instead of owning up to their mistakes, they attack the very people they should be reaching out to the most?

Letters have been sent. Meetings have been had. Yet nothing seems to have changed. As more factual information about the way these leaders have dealt with the situation at hand has come out, I've just gotten angrier. Instead of reaching out to a hurt member of their flock, they've decided to cast them out, all because they're afraid of what will happen to their precious reputation if other members discover how lax they've been in loving the unloved.

At this point I don't know what to do, personally. I feel that I am well within my rights as a Christian and as a human being to be as angry as I am. But I'm having a hard time trying to determine what to do with this anger. One of those ignored letters that I mentioned earlier was sent by me, so obviously, the written word would have no effect. I work during the day, so strolling into the church office during business hours is out too.

Something needs to be done. It's just not right for someone to stand up in front of a congregation and preach the Word of God while refusing to exhibit the love of God.