The Fugitive

This morning I woke up with the theme song from Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego stuck in my head. If you grew up around the same time as me, it probably just got stuck in your head too. It's that song by the group Rockapella from the PBS game show that was on in the early to mid-90s. It's kind of classic.

I couldn't understand why my mind would have this song on a continuous loop. Beyond that, I couldn't understand how it's possible that I remember so many of the lyrics as accurately as I do. I know I haven't heard that song in many, many years. And yet, there it was.

It may have something to do with this week's episode of Saturday Night Live. They did a sketch mocking Hank Williams, Jr. and the Fox and Friends incident. As part of the mockery, they ran a quick list of corrections that the fact-checkers had to come through and supposedly fix because the on-air personalities made some pretty wild claims. One of these throw away gags was "President Obama did not pardon Carmen Sandiego." That little blurb was probably just enough to plant a seed in my brain. And that seed took root.

Throughout the day, I kept thinking about Carmen Sandiego. Does anyone even remember what crime she committed at this point? She's been a fugitive for so long, maybe it's time that someone did grant her a pardon. I mean, if the president can make a show of pardoning a turkey every year on Thanksgiving, surely he can pardon this woman who has seen more of the world than any of us ever will.

What's she charged with? Theft? What did she steal, aside from the hearts of children everywhere? I believe her only real crime is a curiosity for World Geography and the ability to make that red hat and trench coat look good. If a thirst for knowledge is illegal, then you better lock me up too.