Response

No one wanted any advice this week. No one sent any e-mails. No one wanted to hear what I had to say. I guess this whole "advice column" thing was just an experiment in futility. Just one more example of the pointlessness of asking for audience participation here on The Single Guy/Carp Dime.

I didn't even get any fake questions. I was kind of hoping for something ridiculous that I could have fun with. But no. No one wants to play along. So I'll be giving advice to myself today.

Aaron, why do you keep doing this to yourself? Why ask questions to the readership? Every week you do that stupid question of the week and it's extremely rare that anyone answers in the comments. You put the e-mail address out there inviting people to share their own questions in an attempt to help people with their problems. But you get no response. What does that tell you? Stop doing this stuff! You're setting yourself up for disappointment. You're setting yourself up for failure.

You made a commitment last year to do a blog post every day. Why do that? You've only got another month and a half. I say, after the new year, give up the daily postings. Or, even better, drop the blog all together. Shouldn't you be focused on trying to get a full-time job? Aren't there better things you could be doing with your time? Don't you have a flippin' awesome Playstation 3 that you hardly ever play anymore?

And look, I know you're thinking about doing another interactive segment in December. You're planning to have your readers vote in different categories and have some kind of pseudo award show for your lame blog. It's a lame idea. Don't bother. No one will vote in your stupid categories. And don't act like you weren't gonna do that. I know you.

Okay, that's the advice for this week. Hopefully that loser will heed my words. Remember, the e-mail address is over on the right. Send your questions.

Torture

A week ago I put out a call for your questions. Believe it or not, I got a response. This week's question comes from a girl who wishes to remain anonymous...

There is this guy that I have great chemistry with. Our connection is indescribable. He’s told me he feels the same way. In his words, “We are so compatible; you are probably the most amazing person I have ever met!” All seems well, right? The problem is that he has a past with a girl who isn’t exactly the most upstanding citizen. She is in jail. I understand that history with someone is a strong bond and can sometimes be a difficult thing to break away from. But when you meet someone and you have mutual feelings, what is the issue? I feel like he is either lying about how much he likes me or there is more to the story with this other girl that he is not telling me. I’m just really confused on what to do. I enjoy this person as a friend but I do want more from him. At this time, he has made it clear that it’s just not possible because of the other girl. Should I continue to torture myself and be around him or just cut it off?

It sounds to me like this guy has a whole lot of baggage and you’re really only seeing the stuff on the surface. It’s obvious that he does have a complicated history with this jailbird and it sounds like he’s not willing to let go of that yet. He may be telling you that you’re compatible together, but if he’s not able to take the friendship a step further with you, then his heart truly lies somewhere else. It sounds like he’s comfortable with you. He’s unsure of what kind of future he could really have with the other woman, so it seems like he wants to keep you close, just in case. He wants to keep you close, but not too close. This means he could go either way. At this point, he knows he can turn to you if thing go further south with the girl in jail. You’re giving him all the power. I know you enjoy spending time with this guy, but from my perspective, it seems like he’s using you. It’s not going to be an easy thing to do, but my suggestion is to back away from him. You said it, you’re just torturing yourself by being around him. And the longer you stay in that situation, the more it will hurt if he decides to stay with the jailbird. Give him some time; allow him to make a decision. Maybe it’s that whole cliché, if you love something set it free. If it doesn’t return, then it was never yours to begin with.

Thanks for sending your e-mail. Each Sunday I'll respond to e-mails as long as I get some. And they can be as serious or not serious as you want them to be. Feel free to e-mail about anything that you want me to devote time to next Sunday.

Advice

Nicole suggested that I start giving advice. Something along the lines of an advice column. I'm not sure about this, because in the immortal words of Chandler Bing, "I'm not so great with the advice, but could I interest in you in a sarcastic comment?"

But I'll give it a shot. Now, I've tried the whole interactive blogging thing before. Heck, I even try it on a weekly basis with the question of the week. Only occasionally do I receive responses there. And we all saw how well that whole "give me something to write about" plea went.

My e-mail address can be found on the right side of the page, directly under my picture. I'll also post it at the bottom of this entry. Feel free to e-mail me about anything and everything. Ask your questions about anything and everything. By sending your questions, you are at the same time telling me that you don't mind it being published in this blog. However, if you wish to remain anonymous in your queries, I will honor that, just be sure to make that clear when you e-mail me. If you want to go for real anonymity, you can go and create a random e-mail address to send from.

I know, I've complained about anonymity in the comments, but this is a horse of a different color. I will respect anonymity when it comes to asking personal questions. So go ahead, begin your e-mailing.

peckapalooza@gmail.com