Providing Therapy

As a counselor in school, I enjoy the task of observing certain children who require certain services due to certain difficulties they may have in classroom and social situations. That's how I spend the majority of my time on any given school day.

A smaller and probably more important portion of my time is spent in one on one or group counseling sessions. It's during these sessions that most of the therapeutic work is done. That's when I'll discuss specific issues a child may be having in his or her classroom or even at home. It's always my hope that those specific issues will be completely resolved at the end of our half hour together.

Hasn't happened yet.

I have a confession. I have a much easier time with younger children than older ones during these counseling sessions. With kids under the age of 8, I can read a Dr. Seuss book, play some Candy Land and call it a day. That strategy doesn't really work with a 7th grader.

I like having an activity to do. Not only does it help to take up some time, but it also provides a sneaky way to introduce an important topic. Thus far, I'm having a difficult time finding age appropriate activities for the tweenagers. They don't want to be treated like kids, but they're far too immature to be treated like adults. My question is, has anyone found a middle ground?

If a kid doesn't feel like talking, there's not much one can do to convince them to talk. So a lot of sessions turn into dead air.

... ... ...

Gets awkward.

Are there any counselors or therapists out there who have some ideas? I mean, I was a kid in therapy once. But I have no idea how my therapist got through to me. I'm sure I wasn't much of a talker. She must have gotten me to open up somehow. Look how well adjusted I turned out.

Question of the Week: Something New

Source: thisisnthappiness.com via Gregory on Pinterest

When was the last time you tried something new?

I recently began two new somethings: new eating habits and new exercise habits. The eating habits are a big change. I'm eating less, following more reasonable guidelines for portion sizes. I've also switched out some of my regular foods for things that are definitely better for me. The exercise habits aren't so much a change as a beginning. I haven't regularly exercised in years. So I've gone from no activity to walking/jogging every other day. Eventually I want to get into some other exercise habits. But, for now, baby steps. In November, I'll be trying another something new. I'm planning to run a 5k on Thanksgiving Day. Should be fun.

I Understand

"I don't understand!" I screamed over the rush of wind blowing all around us.

"What's not to understand?!" the sorceress shouted right back at me. Her name was Karen and, yes, she was gorgeous. But I tried not to look at her that way. For one thing, she was about 320 years older than me. She didn't look a day over 32, though. But trust me, our relationship was purely professional. And I intended to keep it that way, until our inevitable deaths. Which, judging by our current situation, wouldn't be too far off.

"I did what you told me to do!"

Karen smiled wearily and nodded her head. "Yes, you did! But it was too little, too late! The ritual was completed before we had even had a chance to stop it!"

By now the wind and thunder were near deafening. Soon the vortex would be completely opened and unspeakable evils would spill into our world. I refused to believe that the most we could do now was watch it happen.

My mind raced. I was good with a sword. I was good with a bow. I was even good with automatic weapons, but those wouldn't really be useful against the beasts that would be coming through the portal. The sword I had was enchanted. The arrows I would use had been blessed by priests from the Order. Bullets in a gun might hurt our enemies a little, but they wouldn't do a great deal of damage. Modern weapons never seemed to do the trick. Except for a nuke. Unfortunately we didn't have access to any of those.

So I had my weapons ready. My bow to pick them off as they emerged, my sword for when they got closer. And I had some defensive magic up my sleeve, just in case. But I knew it wouldn't be enough to defend the world. Karen was the one with the real power. I just hoped that she had some good offensive spells that would make a dent in the coming horde.

"They're coming!" she yelled, her eyes never moving from the eye of the vortex. Her vision was obviously enhanced. All I saw was a dark center surrounded by swirling light and debris. Then I notice them. They were ugly with dark green, scaly skin. They were moving quickly. I loaded the bow and sat poised, ready to shoot. Karen looked at me and screamed, "Don't hold back!"

That was my cue. I fired. I fired again. And again. My aim was true as I watched one after another fall. But I knew it would be only a matter of minutes before they reached our position and I would need to draw my sword. In the meantime, Karen was throwing fireballs and lightning bolts left and right.

I was always impressed when I saw Karen work her magic. Tonight, she was taking down dozens of demons at a time. Her next big move was to tear open the earth itself. Well, she somehow made a gorge appear in the ground, which probably swallowed about a hundred of those monsters. And it took a great deal out of her.

They were still pouring out of the portal and they were getting closer. Karen was tired. And I knew it was time for the sword. Thankfully, these beasts weren't the greatest thinkers. If they'd wanted, they could have easily taken us both down, just by sheer numbers. But a few attacked us individually, while the rest continued their march beyond us.

I lost track of how many monsters I slayed with the sword. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see that Karen was holding her own, but she wouldn't last long. Then she stopped.

In a panic, I turned toward her, afraid that she had been struck down. But then I could see that she was thinking. And I saw a sudden look in her eyes. It was a look that I'd seen before. It was the look of victory. She smiled at me, "I know how to close the portal!"

"How?!" I asked, desperate to hold off the B-movie rejects.

"I'm going to cross the streams!" I looked at her, puzzled. "It's from that ridiculous Ghostbusters movie you made me watch!"

I knew what movie it was from. I just didn't see how that applied here. As she explained, I continued putting down any demon that dared approach us. "See the jewel that each of them carries around their necks?" she asked. All I could do was nod. "That's what's allowing them access from the other side. If we can get one back through the vortex, the portal will close!"

"You know, that has nothing to do with crossing the streams, right?!" I yelled.

Karen tore the jewel off the chain worn by one of the dead creatures. She then levitated into the air. Somehow, I knew what she was about to do. "It's up to you to clean this up once it's closed!" she yelled, looking down at me with a certain sadness, as if she knew she'd never see me again.

"Wait! Why can't you just throw one of these monsters back through?!" I asked, desperate to keep my friend and mentor alive.

"Because they are not native to this world!" Karen looked back to the portal. "You're clever, talented, and more powerful than you realize! I expect you to mount a rescue someday!" she shouted as she began flying toward the vortex.

"I understand!" I said as I watched her as she moved through the air, then lost sight of her when I blocked an attack by another demon. I was fighting for my life and for the lives of all humanity when an explosion rocked the world around me. A massive shock wave knocked all of us down.

I sat up and saw the devastation around me. But the portal was closed.

I jumped up, ready to defend myself, but none of the demons were stirring. Thousands of them, lying on the ground. I wasn't sure if they were unconscious or dead. I wasn't willing to take the chance. So I began the long, arduous process of beheading each and every one of them. It wasn't pretty, but it had to be done.

Hours into the clean-up, I realized that something or someone must have been controlling the monsters from the other side. With the vortex gone, access to the creatures' minds must have been gone too.

As I piled demonic bodies to be burned, I thought about all that I would need to do. My first task would be to rid the world of the evidence of these things. Then I would have to figure out who had opened that portal in the first place. Just because they failed to destroy the world tonight didn't mean they wouldn't try again. Then I had to figure out a way to get Karen back to this side, assuming she survived the trip.

Suddenly I was a little sad that I didn't get the chance to really say good bye to her. I knew there was a distinct possibility that I would never see her again. But she had some kind of faith in me. She seemed to believe that I would be able to get her back someday. And I won't stop trying until I do.

Challenge Me

I cannot tell you how many days that I sit down in front of my computer and just can't get my creative juices flowing. Often, I'll look back on my day and try to think of some anecdote to exaggerate to an appropriate, or even inappropriate degree. It isn't that interesting things don't happen throughout my day. Believe me, my days are interesting.

But let me explain how my job works. Once school is over and I sit down in front of my computer, I'm required to write notes about how the day went for each of my clients. So by the time I have free time to post something here, I've already regurgitated my day in a lot of clinical language for the job. I'm sure I could do it all again in a less clinical way, but I don't like repeating myself. I'm just not a fan of redundancy. See what I did there?

So there are a lot of days when I'm not able to come up with something good. That's where you come in.

I want you to challenge me. I want you to provide some random information for me. In response, over the next few weeks, I'll turn your ideas into stories.

Here's what I need from you:

• Character name
• Setting
• An object
• An emotion

You give me those four things, and I'll do my best to come up with a decent story.

I have 53 followers. I don't expect to get 53 responses here, but it sure would be nice to have more than 2 or 3 in the comments. Play along! I hope this will be fun!

AFI 56 - Jaws

Jaws

1975

Directed by Steven Spielberg

Netflix sleeve: Director Steven Spielberg virtually invented the summer blockbuster with this white-knuckle adaptation of Peter Benchley's novel about an insatiable great white shark that terrorizes the townspeople of fictional Amity Island. John Williams's legendary score punctuates the tension as the police chief (Roy Scheider), an oceanographer (Richard Dreyfuss) and a grizzled shark hunter (Robert Shaw) seek to destroy the bloodthirsty beast.

Another film franchise that I didn't know much of as a kid. Jaws: The Revenge was the first of the series that I actually saw. And that movie sucked. I knew that much at the age of 10. I didn't sit through this Spielberg classic until I was an adult. I'm not sure what makes it such a classic, though. It's got some great lines. But it mostly exploits a fear of sharks; a fear that, in reality, is mostly irrational. I do like the scene on the boat where the guys are drinking and comparing scars. They're probably about to face the most dangerous day of their lives, but they laugh and cut up like their lives aren't about to be at risk.

AFI 57 - Rocky

Rocky

1976

Directed by John G. Avildsen

Netflix sleeve: When world heavyweight boxing champ Apollo Creed (Carl Weathers) wants to give an unknown fighter a shot at the title as a publicity stunt, his handlers pick palooka Rocky Balboa (Sylvester Stallone), an uneducated collector for a Philadelphia loan shark. Gritty, grim and epic, this crowd-pleasing film won the 1976 Best Picture Oscar thanks to John G. Avildsen's solid direction and Stallone's root-for-the-underdog script.

This is a film that reaches far back into my memory. I'm pretty sure I was introduced to this franchise when Rocky III came out. It had Mr. T and Hulk Hogan. Rocky and Apollo worked together; they were friends. Imagine my shock when I finally sat through Rocky as a teenager and Apollo was the bad guy. Sort of. Rocky wasn't exactly a good guy. But that's who you pull for. And he doesn't win. But that's not the point of the story. The challenge for the Italian Stallion was to go the distance. He just wanted to go toe to toe with the champ and last 15 rounds. Which, spoiler alert, he did. On a personal note, I'd like to say that my favorite of the series is Rocky IV, in which Stallone single-handedly takes down Communism. Also, the soundtrack has a lot of amazing "get psyched" songs.

A Million Miles in a Thousand Years

Title: A Million Miles in a Thousand Years
Author: Donald Miller
Published: 2011

Donald Miller made a splash in the world of Christian non-fiction with his bestseller Blue Like Jazz. I never read it. But I know it was a big hit among folks in my age group at the time.

For a long time, I only remembered the title of Miller's book. I couldn't have told you who wrote it or even a little bit of what it's about.

Then I was in a bookstore with Mark, who was looking for something inspirational and encouraging for where he was in his life at the time. Blue Like Jazz came to mind for him. The book had recently been made into a movie, so the title had slipped back into our consciousness. Not that either of us had seen the movie. We just remembered its existence.

Mark asked me to text Andy. Since he works in ministry, it's generally assumed that he has his finger on the pulse of Christian popular culture. Andy suggested A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, believing it may speak to Mark a little more than Blue Like Jazz at this time in his life.

So Mark made his purchase and we exited the Barnes & Noble. As Mark drove away from the store, I pulled his new book out of the bag and began reading the introduction. I was intrigued. When we went our separate ways, I asked if I could borrow the book once he finished it.

Like I said, I never read Blue Like Jazz. But I could tell I would like Miller's style from the first few pages of this book.

It seems to me that this is an unofficial follow up to Blue Like Jazz. On the surface, it's the story of making that book into a movie. Scratch the surface, and it's really about Miller's attempt at living a better story.

As a person who finds joy and therapy in writing, Miller's journey struck a chord with me. I know what it's like to take a character and thrust them into situations that will cause some kind of change within them. Why should our own lives be so different?

What kind of stories are we living? Miller points out the reality that most of our stories will be boring. Not that there aren't exciting moments that come along. But the majority of the time is kind of dull.

But what stops us from living a more exciting story? What keeps us from living a story with purpose? With direction? Fear keeps us from challenging ourselves so much of the time. We become content with complacency and it holds us back.

That's where I was a year ago. I was in a job I hated, but because I had become comfortable, I was okay with it. As long as I got that paycheck every two weeks.

I didn't know it at the time, but I wanted a better story. I stepped away from what I knew, what was comfortable. I found myself in a challenging job that I really had no business doing. After a few months, I believed it had been a mistake, making the move I made. Turns out, it was what Miller calls an inciting incident.

This challenging career move and my utter failure in it incited me to find something better for myself. And I've moved forward, changing in ways I wouldn't have thought possible a year ago.

For the first time in my life, I'm certain of what I want to do. I'm certain of what kind of story I want to live.

I want to live an inspirational story. I want my story to encourage and interact with other people's stories. I want to live an adventure story. I don't want to explore the Temple of Doom, but I no longer want to be content with watching others' adventures come to life on the screen. I also want to live a love story, believe it or not. I want to be able to eventually share my story with someone who wants to share her story with me.

God's the writer here. I'm one of his characters. And I can honestly say that I'm looking forward to him writing some more inciting incidents into my story. Not necessarily because I want to be challenged, but because I know my character will grow and change as a result of those challenges.

Question of the Week: Youth in Asia

Would $50,000 be enough money to induce you to take a loyal, healthy pet to the vet to be put to sleep?

No. Absolutely not. No. I'm really not sure what else to say aside from that. I don't have any pets at the moment, but I have in the past. Loyal pets are like family. I think, for me, I'd have a hard time euthanizing a pet that wasn't healthy. Besides, when you think about it, $50,000 really isn't that much money.

*Question of the week comes from The Book of Questions by Gregory Stock, Ph.D

Reasons Why I'm a Horrible Person

Do you ever wonder if you're a horrible person? Well, I don't have to wonder. I know. About myself, I mean. I have no idea if you are horrible. That's between you and God.

If you're nice, or, at least, attempting to be nice, you're probably saying I can't be that bad. You've probably read many of the hilarious things I've written over the years and, therefore, want to give me the benefit of the doubt.

Rest assured, there are plenty of horrible people who have terrific senses of humor. I mean, did you see OJ Simpson in the Naked Gun movies? Right, more stupid than hilarious. But think about Hitler. You think he didn't know how funny it sounds when you're screaming at people in German? He knew.

And there's my first example of why I'm a horrible person. I just used one of history's worse offenders to make a joke and get a ridiculous point across. That had to have crossed some kind of line.

Example 2: I laugh at inappropriate times. But not just that, I laugh at small children.

I was observing the first grade class the other day. And it was a pretty typical day. A kid who is notorious for talking back to his teacher and is constantly out of his seat fell down. But the way he fell was epic. It's the kind of thing that would have gone viral on YouTube (which would just serve to prove how many of us are horrible people). Somehow he tripped over his own chair and did a face plant. He lay on the floor for a good 30 seconds, unmoving. His legs and arms were all splayed out, as if he were preparing for the CSI guys to show up and make a chalk outline.

My first impulse was to laugh. Is that so wrong? He wasn't crying. So he wasn't hurt. And he didn't even fake cry to make it seem like he was hurt. I'm sure that, as he prepared to stand back up, he knew that if he had been sitting in his chair, as the teacher had asked him multiple times to do, he would still be sitting safely. By the way, his teacher had to stifle a laugh too.

The final example I have today involves a sign in front of a local church. That's right, not only will I joke about Hitler, but I'll border on blasphemy. The sign spelled out, in bright colors, "Jesus is the answer!"

You know me. You know I love Jesus. I think Jesus is every possible kind of awesome. But at that moment, all I could think was, "What if the question is 'what is two times two?'" I'm sorry, but the answer isn't Jesus. It's four.

I want to be a teacher someday. Sooner than later. And at some point, I'm going to give my students a test. If I ever have a student who writes "Jesus" as the answer to any given question, they will at least get partial credit. 'Cause Jesus is the answer.

How 'bout it? Am I as horrible as I think?

Losing

This is me, just over a week ago. No, really. Don't let the sunglasses and hat fool you. I'm posting this picture here because I wanted something recent of myself. And I don't figure I've changed too much in the last 9 days.I post this picture because I want something to look back on in a few months.

I hereby announce that I am attempting to lose some weight.

You're probably thinking, "Why would this amazing specimen need to lose any weight?" Notice the slight pudge around the midsection. Just under the word "football" on the t-shirt I'm wearing in the picture. One might call it a gut.

I've never attempted to lose weight before. Especially since that time I lost all that weight from not eating. Not the healthiest way to go about it, I'll admit. This time, I want to be smart about it. Also, yes, making a conscious effort.

But I've noticed some things about myself that I'm not really liking. When I recently bought some clothes, I realized that an X-Large shirt kind of swallows me, but a Large is a little too tight for comfort. That tells me I could stand to lose a few. So I decided to jump on the Mark Hipes weight loss train.

This is a guy who has lost around 80 pounds over the course of the last couple years. He's like a different person. I sat down with him while I was in Bluefield last weekend and got some tips on how I should do this thing.

The first thing I need to do is cut out regular sodas. Now, when he started his weight loss kick, he kicked all sodas altogether. But I need the caffeine. So I'll need to keep getting that fix somewhere. And diet drinks will be the best option. I'm not a fan of a diet soda. It tastes like evil. But I'm starting with the Coke Cherry Zero. It's not so bad. It's like a gateway diet drink.

Next, I need to exercise. This is great because I've been planning to work on the Couch to 5k Challenge to get ready for this year's Drumstick Dash in Roanoke on Thanksgiving Day. I began this morning and walked/ran about a mile and a half. By the end of 10 weeks, I should be fully prepared to run a 5k. That's the theory anyway.

Third, and probably most importantly, portion control. This is pure discipline. I have a lot of respect for Mark and his ability to cut back on his portions. He's a guy that likes to eat. Now he gives himself a little more than he did starting out. Apparently his metabolism kicked up a notch during all this. Wouldn't mind that happening for me too.

Another little step is the importance of whole grains. Oh, and light or fat free foods. And, you know, I'm sure there are other details that I'm leaving out. But those are the big ones.

I weighed myself today. First time I've done that in a long time. Came in at 224.2 pounds. I'm not sure what the American Medical Association says a guy standing 5'6" tall should weigh. And I don't care. But I'd like to get down to 180. That's 44 pounds. And I'd like to do this by the time I turn 33. That gives me 6 months and 3 days. Totally doable.

For the record, I'm not doing this because I want to look better. I'm not doing this to win the affections of some random girl in a white SUV. I just want to feel better about myself and not get winded when I'm walking from one classroom to the other while I'm at work. So take a good look at that guy in the picture up there. 'Cause in 6 months, he's gonna look kind of different.