Oncoming Traffic

What is the deal with people driving on the wrong side of the road? This is a dangerous phenomenon that I come across every single day, multiple times a day, driving to and from work.

I drive down Indian Valley Road on a daily basis. This is a treacherous road under the best possible conditions. God help me on days that see rain. If you ever have the extreme misfortune of traveling down this road, take it slow. Real slow. Because most people don't. Even I don't take it slow anymore. But I never go so fast that I lose control of my vehicle, causing me to drift over the double yellow line going around curves.

For the record, Indian Valley Road has a lot of curves. Particularly of the hairpin variety. Oh, and many of them are blind curves. You know, the kind that block you from seeing what could be just past those curves. Those are the places where people seem to enjoy driving on the wrong side of the road the most.

For a long time, I believed that these idiot drivers limited themselves to near head-on collisions on those blind curves. I've recently determined that is not always the case. While it doesn't happen as often, I do see people crossing over on straight stretches of road.

I can't help but wonder why, after 16 years of driving independently, I'm seeing this so frequently in only a few short months. Is this a problem that is localized to just this one county in which I work? I know it isn't a certain type of vehicle, because I've nearly collided with everything from compact cars to large moving vans. Did the citizens of this county receive a bulletin letting them know that the solid yellow lines in the middle of the road are merely suggestions?

I'd be almost understanding if I found out that there has been a huge influx of immigrants from the UK and they're all having difficulty getting used to driving on the right side. But I've heard nary a British accent in my time here.

So please, I beg of you, if you can't control your car at the increased rate of speed you obviously want to go, slow down. Especially around those dangerous curves. The life you save could be your own. And mine.

AFI 48 - Rear Window

Rear Window

1954

Directed by Alfred Hitchcock

Netflix sleeve: As his broken leg heals, wheelchair-bound L.B. Jefferies (James Stewart) becomes absorbed with the parade of life outside his window and soon fixates on a mysterious man whose behavior has Jefferies convinced a murder has taken place. Meanwhile, other windows reveal the daily lives of a dancer, a lonely woman, a composer, a dog and more. Grace Kelly, Thelma Ritter and Wendell Corey co-star in this Alfred Hitchcok-helmed classic.

This is, by far, my favorite Hitchcock film. James Stewart is one of my favorite actors. Grace Kelly is flippin' gorgeous. And it's a story about a guy who's obsessed with people watching. I can identify with that. I love watching people. It's not an obsession, I just think people are interesting. It's fun to be out in public and imagine what kind of stories a random individual my have. Hitchcock exploits that idea as Stewart's character watches his neighbors through their windows. Of course, the Hitchcock twist is that one of those neighbors is hiding something sinister behind his venetian blinds. The only thing I can't wrap my brain around is why Stewart's character would even consider breaking up with his girlfriend, as we see him thinking about at the start of the picture. She's Grace Kelly, dude! She's a real-life freakin' princess!

The Legend of Sleepy Hollow

Title: The Legend of Sleepy Hollow
Author: Washington Irving
Published: 1820

This is a story I've heard and seen in probably a dozen different versions but never actually read. It's a classic and it's really not long at all. So when I looked for a free ebook to read around Halloween, I figured this one would do just fine.

If you base your knowledge of Sleepy Hollow on the Tim Burton/Johnny Depp movie that came out a few years back, you might be disappointed. Other than character names, it has very little to do with Washington Irving's tale.

Ichabod Crane is a school teacher. He's new to the area and catches the eye off young Katrina Van Tassel, daughter of a well off landowner. The reality of the situation is more likely that she caught Crane's eye, as he fantasized about what it would be like to inherit all that land. She seemed more interested in using the schoolmaster to make Brom Bones jealous. It worked.

It isn't long before Crane has a run-in with the locally legendary Headless Horseman. A series of events and Ichabod's own superstition lead him to believe the ghost is chasing him home one night. And he's never seen or heard from again. It all seems very suspicious. Especially when Brom and Katrina wind up married not long after Ichabod's disappearance.

It's a good, simple read. Kind of makes me want to watch the old Disney animated version. Just to compare notes.

Question of the Week: Belief

What's a belief you hold with which many people disagree?

When it comes to my belief system, I don't generally hold to anything too controversial. Though, judging by last week's election, I'm sure most of the things I believe will be disputed by roughly half the country. But the other half would be on my side. I don't have any beliefs that the majority of the population would frown upon. I tend to be pretty moderate, not really swaying to one side or the other. I'm not confrontational. I don't make waves. That doesn't mean I just make decisions about my beliefs based on what the crowd is doing. I've lived for 32 years and have managed to study and read enough to decide for myself what is important to believe in.

AFI 49 - Intolerance

Intolerance

1916

Directed by D.W. Griffith

Netflix sleeve: Many film historians hail director D.W. Griffith's monumental epic as one of the greatest movies ever committed to celluloid. Griffith powerfully interlaces four parallel tales linked by a recurring shot of Lillian Gish symbolically rocking the cradle of civilization. The stories, which span two millennia, collectively illustrate how intolerance has played a pernicious role in such historic events as Christ's crucifixion and the fall of Babylon.

That movie was some kind of crazy long. It kind of hurts my head thinking about the whole thing. Be warned, if you're gonna watch this movie, it's got to be because you really want to see it. It's got to be because you want to watch a complicated story that constantly cuts back and forth between four different time periods. It's also got to be because you have an extra 3 hours and 14 minutes to spare that you're not planning on using for anything else. Ever. Because you won't get that time back. Ever. I didn't care for it.

Results

I've made a conscious effort to steer clear of political posts during this torturous election season. The way I've seen it, you've had enough people and organizations bombarding you with opinions and statistics trying to convince you to vote for one party or another. Just to be clear, I'd never try to sway anyone one way or the other anyway. Personally, I don't care how people vote. I mostly just care that they vote.

I got up yesterday morning and drove to the precinct and cast my vote for the candidates that I believed would do the best an adequate job. Truth is, I was not and am not excited about either of the presidential candidates. Nor was I thrilled about Virginia's senatorial options. But I did the whole pros/cons thing and made an informed decision. Ideally, that's what all Americans should be able to do.

But I did it. I touched the screen, submitted my votes, and walked away feeling free. Okay, that was a little cheesy. I didn't feel any more free than I did before I walked into the voting booth. I actually walked away feeling disappointed. I didn't get a sticker to prove that I had voted. I was worried for the rest of the day that if someone asked if I voted and I said yes, they'd just stare at me with a look of disbelief and ask, "Oh yeah? Where's your sticker?!" I'd be branded a liar until next November. Or May... if something comes up then.

You know what was great, though? Waking up this morning and browsing through so many posts and comments on Facebook and Twitter. It's so great to see that the majority of the country is able to walk away from a hard-fought election like this with a sense of pride and an air of maturity about the whole thing. It's wonderful to know that so many Romney supporters aren't crying in their Cheerios about how Obama is the anti-Christ and we all have to prepare for the end of days. It's also equally great to see Obama supporters taking the high road and not responding to a win with the "Nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah" method of mockery.

Oh, wait... that's not how it's happened at all. I've seen lots of these kinds of comments from both the reds and the blues. It's sad.

The fact of the matter is, no one person can fix what's wrong with our country. No one party can do it either, no matter how many good people make up that party. The only way we can decide to move forward as a nation is if we find some way to work together. We the people cannot allow our petty differences to tear us apart. Are we truly able to sit back and claim that the United States is the greatest nation in the world? As a whole, we're the most selfish group of people on the planet. We're greedy. We're lazy. We're apathetic. Of course that's an extreme generalization. There are a few among us who are willing to do whatever it takes to make this country and our world a better place. But those few must get so frustrated when they look at the big picture.

My political affiliation is irrelevant and, mostly, non-existent. But I feel confident in my belief that both presidential hopefuls have a love for this country. I'm sure there are people who would argue that point, on either side, but you don't run for president without some desire to see the United States succeed. No one ran for president and said, "I'm gonna spend four years putting the country in the crapper."

I have a great deal of respect for both candidates and for their responses to last night's results. I hope that Mr. Obama is willing and able to do what he spelled out in his speech. I hope he's able to reach out to both political parties and build bridges that are all too easily burned. I stand with Mr. Romney when he calls for us to pray for our president as he enters his second term in the White House. And I do pray for Obama, just as I would have prayed for Romney. Being the President of the United States has got to be a difficult job. I'm sure that should go without saying. It's a job that not many people would attempt to apply for.

If your candidate lost, pick yourself up, go about your day, deal with it. If you're unhappy about the way things are working in your government, do something about it. Make your voice heard. That's a part of what makes America great.

If your candidate won, don't be a jerk about it. I get it. I'm a sarcastic person, so it's easy for me to sit back and make fun of situations. But remember that it could have easily gone the other way. Would you want people on Facebook mocking you for backing the wrong guy? Why not dialogue with those people whose faces your rubbing your victory in? Help them to understand why you support the candidate you support.

We're not allowed to vote until we're 18, considered an adult by the government. We should act like adults, win or lose.

To both sides: if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. At least, not on a public forum like Facebook or Twitter. Negative comments about the winner or the loser just make you look petty and pathetic.

That is all.

First or Last

Will someone please explain to me why it's so important to be first?

I'm not talking about coming in first place in a race or a competition. First place is what people should strive for. It's an indicator of who's the best at something. But why does this carry over to entirely inconsequential events?

So many of the kids I work with get completely bent out of shape if they're not first in line to go to the gym or don't get to go first when playing Pictionary. Why should any of that matter?

The kid at the front of the line gets to the gym about half a second sooner than the kid behind them. They get there about 10 seconds before the kid at the end of the line, depending on the size of the class. The thing is, everyone gets to the same place.

Why throw a fit if you're not first in line? You think if you're stuck somewhere in the middle you'll get to PE and the gym won't be there anymore?

It probably doesn't help that grown-ups perpetuate the belief that the closer you are to the front, the better off you are. After all, I remember being sent to the back of the line being used as an acceptable punishment for shoving or talking in the hallway. If you're at the back of the line, you've obviously been bad.

Now let's take a look at getting to go first when playing games. Is there any kind of correlation between going first and winning a game? Have any studies been done on this subject? I looked on the interweb and wasn't able to find anything definitive. So I can only give my opinion and a guess. I really don't think it matters because everyone has an equal chance to take a turn. Winning a board game has more to do with chance and skill than with turn order.

But the kids still whine and complain about not going first. They cry about how unfair it is. What's worse, I've noticed that adults really don't grow out of this attitude. Did you watch the recent presidential debates? If there had been a drinking game based on a candidate complaining about their turn, one could have easily walked away from the event hammered. Okay, they probably couldn't have walked away easily... stumbled would be more likely. But you get what I'm saying? These are the guys we're expected to choose to lead our nation. Are any of us really any more mature than your average first grader?

Seeing that kind of example, how are we expected to teach kids that going first doesn't matter? "It's not fair that I never get to go first!" whined a little girl in the classroom today. It would be so easy to sit her down, look her straight in the eye and tell her, point blank, "Life is not fair." It isn't fair. Life is just life. Some days you get to go first. Some days you get to go last. That doesn't make life any less enjoyable. It all comes down to what we choose to do with what we're given.

Did Buzz Aldrin complain about being the second man to walk on the moon? I don't think so. You know why? 'Cause he got to walk on the freakin' moon! Did Marty McFly whine about being the world's second time traveler? No! Well... he kind of complained because he got stuck in 1955 for a week. But he got to travel through time. In a flying DeLorean!

I believe it was the great Kenny Rogers who said that "every hand's a winner and every hand's a loser" when he sang about a gambler at the end of his life. Going first, third or last really doesn't matter and it doesn't matter what cards are dealt to you. Whether you win or lose is determined by how you play those cards. Whether you find success or not is determined by how you choose to live your life.

By the way, I was picked last in gym, more often than not. And I turned out just fine.

Question of the Week: Love

Who do you love and what are you doing about it?

I assume this question is referring to the kind of love you feel when you're "in love" with someone. It's a shame the English language only has one word for love, which can be used to express a huge range of feelings. Thing is, I'm not in love at the moment. I'm not even crushing on anyone right now. Well, that's not entirely true, but my infatuation with Ms. Alison Brie is not likely to change any time soon, nor will anything come of it. As for the other loves of my life, my family and friends, I'll admit I'm not putting forth a lot of effort. I visit and call when I can, but often question if that's enough. But I also do this awesome email thing with a close group of friends from college. So, yeah, there's that.

What about you? Are you in looove?

AFI 50 - The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

2001

Directed by Peter Jackson

Netflix sleeve: From the idyllic shire of the Hobbits to the smoking chasms of Mordor, director Peter Jackson has created a world that surpasses the expectations of J.R.R. Tolkien purists as Frodo Baggins (Elijah Wood) embarks on his epic quest to destroy the ring of Sauron. The movie--which nabbed 13 Oscar nominations--is superbly cast with actors such as Ian McKellen (Gandalf) and Viggo Mortensen (Aragorn), and stays remarkably true to the book.

I probably would have placed this one a little higher on the list. But here it is, number 50. I never read Tolkien's Lord of the Rings epic, but the movies based on the books are phenomenal. I remember seeing this in the theater 11 years ago and thinking how visually stunning it was. And it still is. It isn't fair to have just the first part of this trilogy listed here, because in seeing this movie we only get part of the story. Most of the characters' story arcs take all three movies to complete. The exception here is Boromir, played by Sean Bean. I hope I'm not spoiling this for you, but he doesn't make it to The Two Towers. Boromir goes from being an arrogant guy who doesn't think much of anyone around him to basically swearing his allegiance to Aragorn with his dying breath. Try not crying when he calls Aragorn his king. I mean... No, I wasn't crying. I had something in my eye. Anyway, I'm looking forward to The Hobbit starting this December. Should be awesome.

Being Ron Swanson

There will be those of you who are asking, "Who is Ron Swanson?" This means that you've probably never seen Parks and Recreation before.

Ron Swanson is the fictional director of the parks department in fictional Pawnee, Indiana. He's portrayed by the incomparable Nick Offerman. Ron Swanson is who I chose to be this year for Halloween.

I have a job where I'm expected to be a grown-up at all times. So dressing up as a superhero would have been frowned upon. Dressing as Ron Swanson proved to be fairly easy.

The easy part was finding Swansonesque clothing. I figured khakis and a long sleeve polo would do. A little more difficult to deal with was Ron Swanson's trademark mustache. Now, I already had facial hair in the form of the goatee I've worn for the better part of a decade. I just needed to get rid of the bottom half, leaving only the mustache behind. My chin got cold.

I arrived at school and, at first, no one mentioned my slight change in appearance. It's not as if it was a huge change, though. Very subtle. Then I entered the first grade. "Mr. Peck! You grew a mustache!" was the cry of many 6-year-olds. The obviously believe that a mustache is a completely separate growth compared to the goatee I've had all year. Their shouts drew the attention of their teacher. She took one look and immediately burst into laughter. Guess the mustache is not a good look for Mr. Peck.

I agree that it's something I can't really pull off. So the mustache came off today. My mustache just isn't as epic as Ron Swanson's. Honestly, me with a mustache gives me a creepy kind of vibe that I just can't deal with.

There are other aspects of being Ron that I could handle a bit better. It's easy to complain about the ineffectiveness of the government. I also would not mind enjoying a steak dinner. Or all of the eggs and bacon that you have.